I can say with a wealth of experience that from where I've been to where I am.. I am blessed. I love my life the one I have right now.
A few months ago I thought I had the best most supportive people but when things started to look up for me but my mental health was still bad and I struggled in other ways people I thought had me, left. And the worst part was I still loved them very much and I told them that and still... poof...gone all while blaming me, somtimes you give people too much of an ability to hurt you and you still seem shocked when they take the chance.
I think I started to struggle with my judgement at the same time because I thought I was hugely intuitive person, but to have someone so close to you ruin your trust it can shake you. So I did naturally start to struggle a bit. I found myself becoming argumentative or having a fuck it attitude. I think because I was either trying to push everyone away or make them think I didn't care. Anyway as a result other things became effected.
I think after 9 years together Jay and I became a bit distant we stopped communicating and it wasn't healthy. It didn't take us long to talk and sort the small issue we had and end up right back on track. He is my most truest friend because he's always seen people for who they are, I just wish I listened to him more.
My best friend became even closer to me and I never thought that was possible but somehow it was and we helped each other thru some really hard things emotionally and mentally. We were therapists and hype men and cheerleaders all at once, but what I appreciate is that every day she tells me she loves me and she knows me to my soul. It's gone beyond trust she knows my most authentic self.
Walking and dieting took a bit of a hit too, I really felt like everything was just getting ruined and then I thought... approach everything with a kind heart, Have a happy humble soul. Change it for you. I started to do better feel better and think better. I focused more on what mattered and not atall on what didn't. The people who left me when I may of looked like I didn't need anyone aren't worth the chair I left pulled out for them at the table.